fumblinglust's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Missing Him Today is the first anniversary of my grandpa�s death. I don�t quite know how to feel about this. It�s like I was just able to put this past me, and it�s been a year already. My grandpa was essentially me as a man. He was outspoken, he was an actor, he was in his high school�s improv troop, just like me. I remember the last time I talked to him in person, I was telling him about how I was going to Seattle for culinary school, and I remember how happy he was. He was all shrunken in and all he could manage was a smile. I couldn�t hug him when he left for Ohio for treatment because he was too fragile, I could only squeeze his foot. When my mom called me a year ago today to tell me he had died, I went numb. The words meant nothing. We sat on the phone crying for a good while. Later that day I broke down in the shower, I sat down in the tub and cried until the water went cold. I got the job today. I called my grandma to tell her and she said, �Pappaw was looking down on you today.� I totally lost it. I miss him... 5:21 p.m. - 2002-10-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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